Skit: Axe Commercial

It's been a long time coming, but I'm back.

This skit is a World Premiere. It's not something from my personal archives. It's not posted on another site. This is brand new and has never been posted before.

Basically, this skit is a parody of the popular commercials for the men's body spray Axe.

WARNING: This skit contains some rough language and potentially offensive content.

Axe Commercial

Copyright 2005 by Sterling Fisher

This work is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-NoDerivs 2.5 License.

Setting: Store, In The Deodorant Aisle

(Man is standing in aisle looking at shelf)

Announcer: Axe introduces several new varieties...

(Man picks up a can and spays some on himself. A beautiful woman walks up to him seductively.)

Beautiful Woman: You’re so hot! I’d love to have you fuck me...all! Night! Long! But I don’t want to be the other woman...

Man: What the?

Announcer: Introducing Axe Married Man. Because women always want what they can’t have.

(Beautiful Woman walks away)

Man: That sucks!

(Man picks up another can from the shelf and sprays it. An unattractive woman walks shyly towards him.)

Unattractive Woman: Wow! I can’t believe you’re interested in me. (Writes down stuff on paper) Here’s my number. Call me. (seductively) Oh, and I’ve got three flavors of edible underwear for your pleasure!

(Unattractive Woman walks away.)

Man: Oh my God! Gross!

Announcer: Introducing Axe Ugly Girl, because you settle for what you can get.

(Man picks up another bottle hurriedly and sprays it on himself. Baby Mama walks towards him quickly and slaps him.)

Baby Mama: Where yo ass been? You haven’t seen your son TeeTee since he was born! He’s five years old now and wants his daddy!

Man: I don’t have any kids!

Baby Mama: Mmm-hmm. You betta get ready! I’m taking your ass to the Maury show and I’m gettin’ my child support!

(Baby Mama walks away quickly)

Announcer: Introducing Axe Baby Mama Drama...

Man (looking towards sky): Oh shut the hell up!

(Man picks up another can and sprays it on himself. Gay Guy walks towards him.)

Gay Guy: Oh my god, you are such a hottie!

Man: No! God no!

Announcer: Introducing Axe Gay, because not everyone has gaydar.

Gay Guy: Don’t worry, I’m a great teacher!

(Man runs away very fast. Gay guy casually follows)

Announcer: There’s an Axe fragrance for every guy. Also available, Axe Biracial, because two races is better than one.

(END SKIT)